You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
