She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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