Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
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