Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Randomize
