Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
