$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Small penises have feelings too.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I wish you could order shots online.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
