people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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