Got a toothbrush?
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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