They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize