this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
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