Can Purell be used as lube?
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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