there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
