We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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