He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize