It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
