I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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