; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
