i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize