sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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