so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Randomize
