Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
