listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
