I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize