So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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