She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Randomize