Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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