is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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