wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Randomize
