I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
