you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
