How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
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