i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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