Who wears a wallet chain?!
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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