ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
