I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
