i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
