Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Randomize
