There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Randomize