cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize