Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
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