I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize