I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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