We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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