There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
