as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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