I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
