you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
