Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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