But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
