So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
