You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
